Monthly Archives: November 2011

Happy Birthday Mom

Happy Birthday Mom! Today was my mom’s wonderful birthday! Thank you for all you do. You are beautiful and deserving. You have always worked so hard to provide and do well for Courtney and I.

So today I went to employee health to get this itching checked out. All the ARNP did was give me a a steroid. I told her Its not a rash, I have no rash, just severe itching. She didnt care she said theres nothing she can really do for me… WHAT DO YOU MEAN? thats why your supposed to be here, UGH. sooo… I was really upset. I got this lotion

I hope it helps because I dont want to take the steroids because I doubt that they will help.

I feel like its anxiety I wish I could fix it.

So… then I go to the maternity ward to see if my pictures came in since I was already in the area. Of course they wernt in. I went to my moms house and an hour later they call and say that the pictures (of the baby) came in (OF COURSE)… ugh I was so mad. So I went to pick them up. They took one picture and gave me some multiples.

Steven put together my rocking chair.

Its beautiful. I will definitley use it.

well… Im tired and feeling anxious… idk. Tomorrow the furniture comes in so I should go to bed so I can wake up and clean tomorrow.


Oh My Word

soo….. we totally splurged. I want to vomit lol. We moved out to the apartment part of the house today where we have our own bedroom, living room and kitchen. We needed a couch so we went to go look for a cheap one and winded up buying a WHOLE stinking living room! Ill take a picture when it comes in. Sooo… We need to pay that junk off and get on our game. Honestly, its sad but I think shopping is a little bit of ease to our emotional mess that we’ve been through which is not healthy but we understand NO MORE toys for us for a LOOOONNNNG time.

I have been itching like crazy today and haven’t itched all week till today. It is so uncontrollable my neck feels like its crawling cause it itches so bad and its an itch that I cant reach, its under my skin. I HAVE to go to employee health next week and get it checked out cause I cannot stand it anymore. I just want to go crazy. If I had insurance I would honestly go to the emergency room tonight thats how bad it is. I guess its my nerves, I just need something to fix it. Im to the point that I will do ANYTHING to fix this itching.

I crocheted a lot today. I had to work but thank God it was slow so I was able to relax a little. Im gonna do a little more tonight.

Well I am going to bed, have to wake up at 4AM for work tomorrow.

*sigh… wish us luck on not buying ANYTHING else

Black Friday

Black Friday: the day after Thanksgiving where people dont sleep and stay up all night to go shopping for deals (usually fights and crazy things occur over lots of items) and then sleep all afternoon. (I am not partaking in such nonsense lol).

About to head off for work, its 5 AM and Im so sick ugh, it sucks, I want to lay in bed and sleep all day and I still have two more days of work.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving

Today is almost every American’s favorite holiday- Thanksgiving (YAY). Food, family, and more food! I have to work today (which really sucks). And- my face is swollen cause something bit me right under my eye last night when I was sleeping. Every time I look down I see a big lump and it hurts and itches (lovely). BUT-  I am thankful for my sweet Jesus who has had the mercy to save ME. Little old (not really old lol) me who has done nothing for Him, who often forgets to treat Him like the friend He is, who does not always trust him with my whole heart like I should. Thank you Jesus. I am so very thankful that I have a supportive family. Today I thought I would be at home holding my baby boy and passing him around to show him off to relatives but today is lonely day. I will be at work with one other person with no son at home waiting for me. Im sad yes, but I still have a wonderful family who has been there for me always, and especially in the last two months. I am thankful for my friends. It seems like they are few but I am thankful. What would I do if I didnt have other people around to just get away and have fun with? Im thankful for the food I have. There are so many who go without. Im thankful for the roof over my head and the clothes I wear. I literally weep in the car every time I see a homeless person on my way to work. I cant imagine trying to fight off people and animals, the dark cold nights, and the sunny hot days. I don’t have to do any of that. I am thankful.  I am thankful for the things that I have to enjoy myself. Crocheting, art, singing, my car, my job. Things God provided to keep me busy. Thank you Lord.

The last few days I’ve been sick, I sill am today. I just feel yucky and snotty and all gucked up (thats not a real word, its just how I feel lol). I havnt written because of this. A couple of days ago I went into Seths room.

Its a mess but I dont want to do anything with it. It was nice and clean but when I came home from the hospital everyone shoved stuff in it to keep me from seeing it (I understand). It still smells like baby from the wipes and dreft. Sometimes I go in there just to look through things. I miss the excitement of going through the baby stuff and now I cant do that.

This is what we got from the hospital it was nice. I just need to see it  sometimes.

Miss you Seth.

I bought more crocheting stuff.

Im gonna try and learn patterns, in between all of the other junk Im trying to get done lol.

Happy thanksgiving.


Im getting really sick really fast and Im super dizzy. Kind of feel like Im drunk, without the drunk. Going to bed early tonight cause everything spinning. Ill write tomorrow.

First Crochet Project

I have to blog NOW! :D….

I FINISHED MY FIRST CROCHET PROJECT EVER!!! YAY! This is so exciting to say that I made something – WOOT! Here is the final scarf, like I said- I’m going to give it to Steven’s little cousin who’s 5, I hope she likes it lol.

You do not even know how excited I am lol.

*sigh*… pretty pathetic but I love it <3.

So today went by pretty fast. Work was pretty steady so that was nice (and the doctors were in a good mood in the ER tonight so that made things even better). I did an EKG on a young lady tonight and she said she had stomach pain. Her and her significant other sat there awkward and quietly as I continued and all of a sudden the young man burst out in a slightly fearful tone “shes 11 weeks pregnant, will this harm the baby”. I replied “no, but it’s always good to ask, don’t be afraid to even question the doctor”…. The room got quiet and when I was done and cleaning up I just wanted to comfort her, I know she was scared. I said “11 weeks huh? That’s exciting… It will be great”. She replied shyly “Yea, thanks”… I’m sure she was ok.

Later in the office I was editing some read EKG’s and my stomach twitched, it was the EXACT same feeling as the baby kicking. I smiled for a second and thought, “he’s kicking!”… and then sighed… I forgot for a small moment that I’m not pregnant anymore. Two months later and I still sometimes forget…

I am starting to get a sore throat, I hope it goes away really fast cause I have to sing in a couple of weeks. Who likes to be sick… maybe its the change in air, its starting to get a little dry.

Tomorrow I’m going to have lunch with my friend (Erin) from high school. I miss her so much :). She better move back here whenever she finishes college cause its not fun being so far away! Im pretty excited about that.  I’m also excited that Steven is coming home early this week from work because they just have a little bit left. :).

I better do some homework, I have a lot this week and I feel a head cold coming on ugh.

When I am far away from home
and the cold wind starts to blow
when I’m empty and alone 
I turn to you

When there’s hardness in my heart
and i cannot see truth
and i’m wandering in the dark 
I turn to you

and here in your holy presence its all that i can do

I turn to you Jesus
I turn to you Lord

For the youth when I am old
For the strength when I am weak
For the warmth when I am cold
I turn to you.

For the faith to move ahead. 
and to let go of the past.

To see me as you do. 
I turn to you. and here in your holy presence
Its all that I can do.I turn to you Jesus
I turn you LordFor you alone are worthy the one and only God the ruler of the nations and the father of our hearts

I turn to you Jesus
I turn to you Lord
I turn to you you you you Jesus
I turn to you Lord

When I’m weak I will follow. 
In your arms I will stay. 
Will you lead me’ 
only you can save. 

I turn to you Jesus 
I turn to you.


This is my sisters blog  – Hero.

I have the best baby sister in the whole world. Sometimes I feel like I need to be much more of a role model. I dont feel like I deserve to be any type of hero but Im lucky to call this girl my best friend. I love you Courtney Louise!