Its for the best… I guess?

This is my second post today… unusual but I guess Im just feeling a little different this evening. Maybe a little down… I dont really know? its weird. I guess. Steven is out of town working and Im finally home from work now that its 11pm.

I just feel a little disappointed I guess. things sometimes just dont go the way I plan but I have to remember, its for the best.

I also think I lost a friend recently. Thats hard. There is this tension between us anyway for certain reasons but, a friendship that has been built for years and somehow always finds its way back to the middle when we kind of go away from each other- thats hard to just throw away. Maybe its for the best. Its interesting how you can feel an emotion for someone else isnt it. Jealousy that they have what I want, sorrow that you cant be as close as you want,  selfish that you want them to be happy but not to go away.

Tonight Im going to crochet to feel better but I wish I had someone to talk to . I wish Steven was home. I wish I had a friend that was right here lol. I wish Steven had a normal job where he worked in town and stayed at home, this is too much. Too lonely.

Im not really sad or down or crying, I just feel off. Im even listening to music that I dont normally listen too…..?

but anywho… just thought Id vent before I work on my next project.

lots of love.

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2 responses to “Its for the best… I guess?

  1. I feel that way too lol but I’m always back and forth about it. I want more friends, people to hang out with… Then I don’t want to be bothered. It’s just hard to trust people. Lol I want to still have a sisters day with yall, but I’m thinking about having a big girls night thing at my house too. No wonder girls take time out to do that, it’s much needed sometimes.

  2. crochet is a little like meditation – it will help you work through these times 🙂

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