Those days

… Those days when your heart feels like mush…. today. I have a good friend who had a baby today. and a cousin who had a baby a couple of days ago.. of course its everywhere. Im happy for them, but Im not happy for me. Its especially hard when the friend who had a baby (who is at the same hospital that you work at) isnt that close with you anymore but of course wants to share pictures and whatever- that can just bring on more anger. I just feel slightly defeated. I have to get over it. Im not angry/mad/throwing a fit… just, … sad.

Ive been crocheting my brains out to make myself feel better, heres what I got… all baby/ photo prop items. (my next project is a purse).

yeah so… thats about it.

I start physics in exactly one week and Im a nervous wreck

my thoughts are…..

*How am I going to handle 9-1 school/2-10 work, and fit homework in? How am I going to get through a whole physics text book in 1 month and actually understand it? How am I going to have time for myself or my husband or cleaning or cooking…? How am I going to sleep?

I know I just have to do it, just really scary, its the hardest class and the dean has already spoken to us and told us, 1/4 of each physics class fails every month. :/ AGHHH :(. I dont want to fail cause this class cost me about $2000. :O

Until them, Im going to keep crocheting. and trying to mentally prepare myself.


5 responses to “Those days

  1. I love the mermaid outfit! Where did you get the pattern?
    You are working so hard Hollie, that’s how you will get through it all. You have been through (and continue to) more than most people have to endure – physics is a walk in the park (or an apple falling from a tree?).
    hugs for you o

  2. I know exactly what you mean about happy for them, sad for you. I have friends all around me and 2 first cousins that just had babies. It’s everywhere. Sometimes I’m a little bitter. Why do they get to keep their babies and I don’t? But most of the time I am happy for them, but would be a whole lot happier if it could be me too.

  3. corrine0928

    Thank you for sharing your crochet projects, it’s been 4 months since my son died, and I can’t get my brain to function properly. The only thing I am able to concentrate on is knitting. It’s so therapeutic, I’m so grateful to have a hobby that allows me to ‘feel normal’ for a few minutes every day, while also producing something special and meanigful for someone else. ~Corrine

  4. Hollie, that mermaid outfit came out so good! :] I’m so proud of you lol

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