Crazy birth boards

All these women on babycenter.com ‘s birth-board for my month (Jan. 2013). All they talk about is miscarriage. Its aggravating, Ive stopped looking at the board because 1. you cant stop miscarriage from happening, 2. I shouldn’t worry myself, and 3. I want to punch them in the face. I understand how devastating miscarriage is, but my main concern is not the first 12 weeks, its the last twelve weeks. When you say something like that everyone looks at you like you have three heads, because not even a quarter of them have experienced how traumatic a stillbirth is. Not only do stillbirth babies pass away, You must actually have contractions, feel labor, remember laboring, and go home empty handed after you held your fully developed, real size baby.

I just got so tired of their complaining. If I even dare bring it up that I have over a half a chance of losing my baby in the third trimester when we are weeks away from meeting him, people will jump on me like Im all crazy and not even care because they are deemed “safe” after the first twelve weeks.

I shouldnt be all crazy about it but I just needed to vent about these psycho women who scare themselves into miscarriage cause all they do is talk about it … crazies, relax and let your body do what it does best and God forbid that time comes, you stand up for your child. I think I would rather get past the first few weeks and feel safe then wonder every day – well closer to the end means closer chances. I would take 12 weeks over 40 weeks of worry.

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3 responses to “Crazy birth boards

  1. I wish I didn’t understand this post, but I do. When I was pregnant with Tabi, I rarely visited the pregnancy forum because they were all so consumed with miscarriages and getting through the first 12 weeks. For me, the first 12 weeks are a breeze. It is AFTER that that I worry. I know I can make the first trimester, and if I don’t, it’s different. Very different. You love the baby, and yes, you lost a baby.. but you haven’t felt kicks, you haven’t bonded as long. You don’t go through labor, wash your baby, dress him or her, take pictures. You don’t make a scrapbook or send pictures or have to answer a lot of questions. I’ve done both. I’ve had a partial miscarriage (twins, one survived), 2 miscarriages (one the day after we found out – ie, chemical; one at 13 weeks – AFTER the “safe zone”), and 2 stillbirths.

    You’re not alone in your thinking, but they are still naive. I think you have to actually experience a stillbirth to have the fear switch like ours has. Otherwise, “that won’t happen to me.”

    Unfortunately, that wouldn’t have happened to me either… but it did. Twice.

    Congrats, and good luck. Wishing you the very best and easy first trimester… and healthy, living last trimester.

  2. Agreed! SO agreed. I thought the “Rainbows” board would be good, but it is just a giant freak-out. I understand that they’re scared, but it freaks me out too. I decided today that I’m in the 37ww instead of the 2ww. That time of waiting to see if I got pregnant is much less scary and stressful than waiting to see if my baby will survive. Come on rainbows!

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