New things

The past few days the babys kicks are getting a lot harder and becoming more frequent. Its WONDERFUL! I love the feeling (Im 19 weeks 2 days today) .

The only thing is I have been getting awful braxton hicks. They make my tummy harden and it hurts for a good few minutes about 5-10 times a day. I did not really get an braxtons last time.

I am just so happy that Im starting to feel my sweet baby now, its the best feeling ever,

I feel really guilty about today but I just have been feeling weird. I spent a lot of money. I really want to save money right now but 1. I am baby nesting, 2. I want to craft. The problem: we have no space.

I bought quilting supplies because someone is teaching me to quilt and Im make a quilt for the baby… that was expensive. I bought  6 baby hats, 2 soft/bumpy changing table covers, 4 hand mittens, and 5 childrens CD’s, all for $20 (that wasnt a bad buy).  And I had to buy 2 work scrub shirts because of course the hospital is going into a stupid color change where every department wheres a specific color- it SUCKS (2 scrub tops were $43- THATS REDICULOUS- I dont even spend that much on regular clothes!)

I reallly really really really (did I say really) – wish that we had AT LEAST a 2 bedroom place. Right now we have the crib set up where our dining room table used to be (which we had to get rid of to move the crib in) , and we have the changing table in the living room. We have to get rid of the coffee table so we have enough room but Im so upset that I have NO tables- where am I supposed to sew???? :'(. I just wish I had a place to do me things and have a space for the baby. I feel depressed like Im in a rut. We can never get a place as long as Im making as little as Im making and as long as Steven is not making a definite paycheck every week. Working contracts is a NIGHTMARE because we dont know how our future is going to unfold.

Maybe thats why I went shopping honestly, because I just feel stuck sometimes and guilty. I want to have a wonderful home for our child and enough space to feel comfortable and call our own but unfortunately, Steven doesn’t have a normal job. I really want to support him but come January when the baby comes- were gonna have to make some decisions about how we are living.

Cant wait to see this baby and just forget about everything else. I cant wait to finish this quilt. I really do enjoy quilting, I just need somewhere to do it not besides my friends’ houses . I cant wait to see what it looks like finished :D.

anyways, now that Ive done nothing today I should get going ❤

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